Wednesday, August 23, 2006

Cat Killing Coons

Did y'all read about this problem they're having in Olympia Washington? Raccoons.

Yeah, it seems that they think raccoons are cute, and the coons have done what coons do. They're terrorizing the neighborhood and killing the cats. The residents, of course, are unsure what to do about the problem.
The problem got so bad that residents Kari Hall and Tamara Keeton even started a Raccoon Watch after having an emotional neighborhood meeting attended by about 40 people.

"It was a place for people to mourn and cry," Hall said.

At the meeting, they encouraged people to stop feeding the raccoons. They also decided to keep their pets and pet food inside. And they decided to carry pepper spray to drive off raccoons that attack again.
Mourn and cry. Yeah, that always works. Pepper spray might work in the short run, but a good .22 rifle would work better.

Every Southern country boy would know immediately how to handle the problem. It would involve culling the little bandits. I'm surprised the coons haven't started killing the dogs. If you've never seen the damage a big ole boar coon can do to a pack of hounds when he's cornered, you really don't understand the raccoon.
Tony Benjamins said that in previous years, raccoons would come within 5 feet of cats with no problems. "We used to love the raccoons. They'd have their babies this time of year, and they were so cute. Even though we lived in the city, it was neat to have wildlife around." But this year, things changed.
Yeah, well, that the problem with wildlife.... It's wild.

Some of the descriptions are fairly graphic:
The raccoons are so bold they bit Lisann Rolle when she tried to fling three of them off of her cat, Lucy.

"I was watching her like a hawk, but she snuck out," Rolle said of Lucy. "Then I heard this hideous sound - a coyote-type high pitch ...

"It was vicious. They were focused on ripping her apart."
Uuuh, yeah. That's what they do.

Here is the thing. When people domesticate animals, like pets, they assume responsibility for the feeding and care of those animals. Part of that responsibility is protecting your animals from depredation. If you let a coon tear your pet apart, it isn't the coon's fault. It's your fault for letting it happen.

Evidently the people of Olympia have forgotten all that.

Hat tip to BMEWS.


wst... said...

that is hilarious. did you read the comments at the end of the article? they are equally as funny. heres one that stood out:

I am one of the pet owners described in this story. I am also a lifelong conservative Republican and a proud WWII vet and I'd like to damn to hell each and everyone one of you southern hicks who are spouting off here. How dare you bring your moronic political rants into my neighborhood, with all your assumptions about Washingtonians and our way of life.

Olympia is a city. We are not some backwood hollow, where we can just come out guns ablazing.

You people need to take care of your own problems (and you certainly have a lot of them) and leave us to sort out our own.
Rick L. | 08.22.06 - 7:52 pm |

Anonymous said...


Im from Reno, Nevada and I find the whole thing hilarious. So does that make me a "southern hick"? Because if it does I think Id take it as a compliment.


Janean said...

Used to live on the edge of a slough in NW Oregon. Had the same problem. Neighbor was feeding the stupid things. So they started coming around. Caught one of them one time on my ENCLOSED front porch eating my pitbull's dog food! Cheeky little buggers!

Then they decided my chickens looked better. I TOTALLY enclosed those chickens and the bugger would sit and wait till one got close enough to the side of the pen. I would come out to feed in the morning and find half a chicken carcass hanging from the inside. AAaargh.
Finally met up with the thing one night. Leaving my driveway and he's on the side of the road sitting there. Vehicular raccoon-icide comes to mind. But I drove right up to him and he just SAT THERE staring at me!
This may seem like idiocy on my part...but I threw the car in reverse, ran up the porch and grabbed my 12-gauge. Walked down the driveway and took care of my 'coon problem! :D
VERRRY satisfying!