Noticed one of the teenage grandsons had scratches all over his arm. "What the hell happened to you?
"I was petting a stray cat, then I tried to pick it up, and it went off on me."
"You couldn't turn it loose?"
I was trying to turn it loose."
Valuable life lesson. Sometimes you want to pet something, and find out it's almost impossible to turn that thing loose, as bad as you want to. This time it was just a stay cat. Net time it might be something more dangerous, like a psycho-chick.
That's a valuable life-lesson, right there.