Thursday, December 12, 2019

Robo Calls

We all get them, those infuriating calls that come across our telephones, trying to help us with Medicare benefits, or computer support, or a car warranty. 

Several years ago, I added our numbers to the US Do Not Call list, which never expires and which they routinely ignore.  The question, for me at least, is whether or not I'm talking with a machine, or a sentient person.  And yes, sometimes I'll wait to talk to a representative.  When I know that I have an actual, breathing human on the line, I start having my fun.  I curse them artfully, often using archaic terms, to call into question their heritage, intelligence, and sexual proclivities.  This practice helps me expand my vocabulary and use terms not commonly in vogue today.  Being fully retired, as I am now, this recreation helps keep my mind nimble and my soul amused.

One moron told me yesterday that he had no idea what a "catamite" was, so I told him that he should immediately seek a dictionary,, preferably a printed one, and study the English language.  While he was at it, he should look up coprophilia,  because I feared that he suffered from that condition as well.

5 comments:

Mike Silvius said...

You'd be most well equipped to lay some pressure on the caller telling him he has just called a murder scene investigation and he has now become suspect number one.

Carl "Bear" Bussjaeger said...

Back before most telemarketer calls were robo, I used to answer my phone, "Agent Smith, Fraud Division. How may I help you."

Retired cop said...

1. The use of any technology which gives a false reading of the originating phone number should be a felony.
2. The phone company should automatically disconnect any phone service wherein such technology is being used.
3. Phone spammers should be declared enemies of civilization, this enabling their use as training missions for Navy Seals in CQB and as practice targets (Live fire missions) for air to ground strikes, preferably televised live ( Right thru the window, Bob!)

I vote for option #3.

Old NFO said...

That's great! I usually just blow the airhorn and hang up.

Judy said...

I've got to the point, if I don't recognize the number, I don't answer.