Statutory Rape

Acidman tells this story about his brush with child-molesting. I had nearly the same experience, although I never lived with the gal. When I graduated from high school, I was just seventeen years old.

Middle of my freshman year of college, I finally turned eighteen and a couple of buddies decided it was time for my first legal beer. We went to celebrate at a German restaurant just down the road from the Air Force Base. The waitress was a darlin to behold. About five-foot six, with long shapely legs and a tiny waist, her dark brown hair flowed over her shoulders and framed a perfect heart-shaped face. Her biggest attractions were a pair of 36D breasts that were just barely contained by the V-necked top she wore at work.

When I ordered a pitcher of beer, she asked for my ID, and I proudly showed her that I was, in fact, legal to buy beer. She laughed and said that the first one was on the house, and happy birthday. My buddies and I had a good time and we flirted with that waitress. Let's call her Janet.... for this story.

We learned that Janet's dad owned the place and that she helped out after classes. Her Mom cooked in the back and they hired a couple of local girls to wait tables. Janet worked the bar, Mom cooked, Dad kept the cash register, it was quite a family business. Before I left that night, I had her phone number. The guys and I agreed that she had to be at least eighteen years old to serve liquor, so I called and asked her out.

We went to the local drive-in, and before the night was over, Janet and I had left for a local lovers lane where she showed me all the good things that come from being eighteen, having a car and a quiet place to park. Over the next several weeks, we explored the erotic arts at every opportunity, in sundry locations across the parish.

One fateful night, she told me that she was having a birthday party and I should come to her house at 7:00. I showed up with a present under my arm and was shocked when I counted the candles on the cake and there were just sixteen. That's right. Sixteen. I almost had a stroke, expecting the police to show up at any moment and drag me off for having carnal pleasures with a fifteen-year-old.

I knew two things: 1) that the relationship couldn't continue and 2) if I pissed her off, she might call the police.

So, I hatched a mighty scheme. One of my buddies was asking about her, and sniffing around. I told him I was about to move on, go back to college, and he could ask her out if he wanted to. He did. She did. They did, and she broke up with me the next week. My friend was a year older than I and had a much nicer car. I waited a couple of weeks, till their relationship was hot and heavy, and gave him THE NEWS. He cussed me like a shipwrecked sailor, but couldn't break up with her until he went into the Army a couple of months later.

No one went to jail, but it could have gone either way.