Mystery Solved

Science has done it again. They've cracked the code to the yeast used to make lager beer.

Scientists have cracked the mystery behind lager beer after years of research and found the yeast's genomic foundation, paving way for new types of designer beers.

This is important science. Much more compelling than global warming, or nuclear physics. This is good biology. Beer is a lubricant for the soul, a gift from a benevolent God, a triumph to man's desire for a more salubrious existence. As the Friar Tuck character so plainly stated in the movie Robin Hood, Prince of Thieves.

This is grain, which any fool can eat, but for which the Lord intended a more divine means of consumption. Let us give praise to our maker and glory to his bounty by learning about... BEER.

May it always be so.