Wednesday, June 15, 2005

Fathers Day

I'm with Kim about the Hallmark Holidays. I think most of them are pure bullshit. It caused me grief during my first marriage. The standard conversation went like this:

She: "What are we going to do for Mother's day?"

Me: "I don't care. Either go to your Mother's, or mine. Whatever."

She: "Will we be doing anything special?"

Me: "You aren't my mother."

Needless to say, before I get again accused of being a heartless bastard, I know who my Mother is. I love the lady, would sell heaven or earth for her, and as long as she is alive will never want for anything if I can do anything about it. I know what she has sacrificed for me and will spend my life repaying the debt.

I love my current wife, and think that the stars move around her, personally. I think everything she does is magical. One of the reasons is this conversation we had early in our courship.

She: "What would you like to do for Mother's Day?"

Me: "Look, sweetheart, I love you. If your kids have something special planned, then I am all for it. My kids will spend it with their Mother. You ain't my Momma."

She: "Damn right."

The obverse is also true. I ain't her Father. I don't expect anything from her for Fathers day.

My kids know their Father. With three boys and one daughter, all members of the Nation of Riflemen, they have a pretty good idea of gifts, large and small, for any occasion. If it is something gunny, from a knife to a new caliber, then they are on solid ground. The gift can be small, like a new die, animal call, or sharpening stone. If I happen to have one, then a duplicate is wonderful. Tools are always wonderful, because, frankly, I am a guy and I don't own all the tools yet.

But, I expect my wife to Stand By, and let my kids do their thing on Father's day. A hug from those nearby, or a call from those away, is really all I expect. They can never repay me for the sacrifices I made, and I don't expect them to try. I tried to repay my Momma by being the best Father I could be. I expect them to repay me by being the best parents they can be. Family comes first. Take care of your kids and teach them what I taught you. Keep the craft of parenting alive.

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