Insty talks about a story where a father bought is now 15-year-old daughter a DNA test and they found out to their shock that the daughter is not biologically related to the father.
Earlier this year, after buying his now-15-year-old daughter an AncestryDNA test, Christopher found out that he is not her biological father. His wife had an affair.That's a problem, but it leads us to the question of fatherhood. If a man raises a child from birth, doe it make him any less a father than if he had biologically conceived the child? Or, is a step-dad who marries a woman with children any less a father than the fellow who abandoned her?
It's an horrific tale, but DNA testing is a genie that can't be easily put back in the bottle. From a prominent senator who's DNA test invalidated her ancestry claims, to the nameless, faceless people who find out that they are not related to the people that raised them. The revelation must be a terrible event, with aftershocks of betrayal and self-doubt.
Still, it's not the child's fault, and The child is blameless in any of these scenarios. We've gotta love the children that they bring us, regardless of the science behind the conception.
My youngest and his wife did the DNA test. His results didn't match our family "lore". I had mine done and it turned out he was my progeny; the family "lore" was wrong.
ReplyDeleteEither way it wouldn't have affected my feelings about my son, but would have had a huge impact on my relationship with his birth mother.
If the man enters the marital arrangement with a woman and she has children....then he is accepting that arrangement with all the baggage. But, if the wife has an affair and conceives and doesn't tell the hubby....and he finds out....does he have to accept that arrangement?
ReplyDeleteI say no. Because the hubby didn't have the opportunity to say ya or nay to the arrangement...it was thrust upon him. He did not have all of the information needed to make a decision.
Now if(and I read another post in which the hubby divorced the wife) the hubby wants to maintain a fatherly relationship with the child.....then that would be an informed decision.
Steve